The Path of Witchcraft is, at its heart, a path of healing. The oppressed, the disenfranchised and downtrodden, all are welcome here, and all find relief from the harshness of life. Paganism is about connection, to land, to spirits and to each other. We grant each other support and acceptance without question. We belong to a beautiful melting pot- the cauldron of inspiration, a community built on joy and hope.
Sadly, not all spiritual communities offer the same. Many practitioners only find this beautiful path after other spiritual groups have harmed them. They seek freedom, not from societal oppression, but from harsh and dogmatic religions. I am one such practitioner, having been raised in a high-control fundamentalist faith, sometimes referred to as a cult. This has left the deep and insidious scars of trauma.
How does this religious trauma manifest on the path of Paganism? What might we carry forward in us? What insidious poisons are stuck in the back of our minds? I cannot discuss them all in this article, but I would like to speak about one I have found difficult to shift: The concept of a dogmatic morality.
To explain what I mean I must first explain a little about the fundamentalist mindset. Christian fundamentalism is the belief that your religion is the ultimate truth and superior to all other beliefs. It emphasizes a strictly literal interpretation of sacred texts. In the context of Fundamentalist Christianity, this means a strict adherence to the bible as the ultimate authority, and a strict, literal belief in what it says. There is no room for interpretation or personal gnosis, your beliefs are prescribed and rigid – a set menu with no substitutions.
Contrast this with the buffet of paganism and witchcraft and you would be forgiven for questioning how any aspect of that mindset could be carried over. But this is the insidious thing about religious trauma, it hides in the shadows, waiting to attach itself to something familiar. If it were obvious, it would be easily addressed. It is a subtle attachment to the things you are used to, a clinging to things you no longer believe in.
Eternal Consequences
You are not OK. You are not saved. Your eternal soul is doomed to hellfire if you don’t do the ‘right’ thing. That’s an incredibly difficult belief to shift. It’s about your well-being, your eternal existence. You must appease God or suffer the consequences.
For those raised in fundamentalism, this fear and appeasement is an everyday reality. So, who do you appease when you leave those beliefs behind?
In Paganism this can manifest as the belief in some absolute cosmic balancing force. If you do the wrong thing, you’ll be punished. If you do the right thing, you’ll be blessed. And while there may be some merit in this thinking on some level, when you take your morality by prescription, because you read this is good, or that is bad, it often comes from a place of trauma.
Think about the aversion many people have to baneful magic. Where does that come from? From the fact the creators of certain traditions decided cursing was not ok. They have prescribed a morality, often given a clear consequence for violating it (think of the threefold law), and for those with trauma its easy to take that package deal. It’s easy. It makes sense to us. Someone is telling us how to feel, and the cosmic balance is restored.
Think about the aversion many people have to baneful magic. Where does that come from? From the fact the creators of certain traditions decided cursing was not ok. They have prescribed a morality, often given a clear consequence for violating it (think of the threefold law), and for those with trauma its easy to take that package deal. It’s easy. It makes sense to us. Someone is telling us how to feel, and the cosmic balance is restored.
And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. If a belief in a balanced universe helps you, by all means hold on to it.
The problems creep in when you are dogmatic about your morality. When you feel a sense of superiority because of what you will, or won’t, do. That’s when things become divisive. If you feel that baneful magic is against your moral code, that’s fine. If that belief causes you to separate from others who don’t share it, or feel superior to them, that’s trauma.
The good news is that the first, and most vital, step to dealing with trauma is noticing it. Only when you notice this insidious poison are you empowered to take the antidote. And the best way to notice?
Ask the question ‘Why?’
Why do I feel the way I do? Why do I believe the things I do? Why do I believe what this person wrote or said? Why do I feel superior?
Dig deep. Answer honestly. Find the places where you cannot give an answer. Those are the places where your trauma takes over. Your response comes from that trauma, not from yourself. That is why you cannot answer. It is an automatic, almost programmed feeling, not a conscious thought.
That’s not as easy a thing as you may imagine. There is a certain resistance to the asking, a clinging to the way it’s always been. Perhaps we may half-ask, and our answer is simply that: its how it has always been done. But a deeper self-reflection is required. The why must be fully answered.
So how can you defeat the trauma?
Simply keep asking Why.
Ask until you have an answer that comes from you. Refuse to have your morality dictated any longer. Fundamentalism demands you never ask why. Witchcraft demands you always ask it.
The more you ask why the more you will discover paganism has no room for being dogmatic. So much of your practice originates in personal gnosis, or in the personal gnosis of whoever handed the tradition on to you. There is no universal, balancing entity who you must always appease. You are the agent of your own morality.
So ask why. Question always. Question everything. Dig deep. Discover why you assign a moral value to certain actions and accept that you are the one assigning it. Resist the temptation to feel superior. It is an alluring trap, but a knowledge of the why will help you avoid it.
Nothing kills community quicker than a sense of superiority. Do not turn paganism into the very thing you worked so hard to escape.
In leaving a fundamentalist belief system you have essentially eaten of the tree of the knowledge of good and bad. No God dictates it for you anymore. You are on the path of knowledge and have the freedom to decide for yourself.
You are liberated. Take that liberation and turn it inwards. Walk the path of enlightenment. Always ask why and be open to the answer. Then you can begin the process of burning your trauma away, and step into your power ever more fully.
Moss Matthey is a German witch, author, and cult survivor, born and raised in the Harz Mountains. He has experienced firsthand the liberating power of witchcraft, and has been set firmly on a path of self-discovery and enlightenment. He was mentored by Mhara Starling, author of Welsh Witchcraft and expert in Celtic Paganism. He now sits on the Council of the Sarffes Goch tradition of witchcraft which sees Mhara as its High Priestess. If you enjoy his work or have any questions feel free to get in touch!